Singles Center

One Less Bachelor For Gold Diggers

2007-02-27T00:00:00.000-05:00

Salon reports that the rumor buzzing around Oscar parties in Hollywood this weekend was that Hugh Hefner, 80, is planning to marry girlfriend Holly Madison, 27, sometime this year. It would be Hefner's third marriage.

This is the lucky lady:

So, you old geesers reading this, don't sell yourselves short. You could get them youn' ones too. All you need is many millions and a harem of Playboy playmates to pick from.

Peace of cake!

13 ways to spice up your sex life

2007-02-20T00:00:00.000-05:00

Hey, it doesn't hurt to get all the help you can get.

This story shows, with pictures, 13 ways to spice up your sex life. And they're not all just for men either.

Some are pretty obvious, such as getting exercise and using Viagra. But others are not discussed as often: gene therapy, Testosterone Gel, A Nose Spray (no, that's not a mistake... nose spray), Pumps (for you, ladies) and a few more. With each picture there's a comment indicating if the item has been scientifically proved to work or not.

Looking for a girl that matches your wallet?

2007-02-15T00:00:00.000-05:00

If you're a busy and rich men looking for a fine looking woman, listen up:

Janis Spindel is a high-end matchmaker for rich, powerful men, and she trolls upscale department stores looking for the women of their dreams. She doesn't run a dating service or engage in any casual pairings. Instead she works on behalf of men who pay massive sums of money — $25,000 to $100,000 per pairing — to find a wife. For each of her clients she conducts interviews, a home visit, a faux date and psychological exams to learn if they're safe, serious and ready for a wife. Then she goes out and shops the world to find the ideal mate.

"Guess what? Hiring a matchmaker is not taking away from falling in love naturally," a very confident Spindel explains. "It's doing the editing and bringing you on a silver platter three wonderful women that you're going to marry one of them."

By her own count, Spindel is responsible for more than 750 marriages and more than a thousand committed relationships. She says anyone who wants to be married, can be. To those who think "all the good ones are taken," she shouts, "wrong!"

Um... if I had that kind of money, this sounds like a good idea. Come on, it is! It beats lurking the Sugardaddies website.

Romantic love is a drug

2007-02-13T11:26:00.000-05:00

This article about romantic love is well-worth reading in it's entirety. Here's a summary of some choice quotes:

Dopamine. God's little neurotransmitter. Better known by its street name, romantic love. Also, norepinephrine. Street name, infatuation.

These chemicals are natural stimulants. You fall in love, a growing amount of research shows, and these chemicals and their cousins start pole-dancing around the neurons of your brain...

"Love is a drug," says Helen Fisher, an anthropologist at Rutgers University and author of "Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love." "The ventral tegmental area is a clump of cells that make dopamine, a natural stimulant, and sends it out to many brain regions" when one is in love. "It's the same region affected when you feel the rush of cocaine."...

Passion! Sex! Narcotics!

Why do we suspect this isn't going to end well?

Because these things are hard-wired not to last, all of them. Short shelf lives. The passion you fulfill is the passion you kill. The most wonderful, soaring feeling known to all mankind . . . amounts to no more than a narcotic high, a temporal state of mania.
Oliver Sacks, the famed neurologist and author, once cited the case of a 90-year-old woman who had suddenly become radiant, flirty, even frisky. The diagnosis: a long-delayed onset of neurosyphilis had loosed the reins on her inhibitions. She did not want to be treated.

Damn, maybe there is something to those arranged marriages.

Scientists continue to confirm what we, at many levels, already know, namely that love is a drug, that love sucks, that love blinds us. The thing is, most of us, like the 90-year-old lady in the article, don't want to be treated.

Dinner, Movie -- and a Background Check

2007-01-30T00:00:00.000-05:00

This is a really good article about online dating and safety. It lists a lot of websites that in one way or another provide services dealing with security:

In the past decade, sites such as Yahoo Personals, Match.com and eHarmony helped make Web-based courtship mainstream for 10 million current daters. But some seasoned veterans say the thrill of using the Internet's power to find soul mates has given way to caution. Singles now draw on a growing arsenal of security and research tools -- from services that verify identity and background to companies that provide temporary phone numbers as a barrier to stalkers. Sites like DontDateHimGirl.com allow scorned lovers to warn others away from their bad dates.

The growth of the dating-security industry is part of the evolution of the Internet, where every powerful tool such as online banking or e-mail comes with a dark side of data theft and spam messages.

Dating site True.com is the only major Web firm that conducts criminal and marital background checks on all of its members -- a practice that keeps 2 percent of applicants from joining because they are convicted felons. Three percent flunk because they are married, the company said.

Hoping for Good Sex in 2007

2007-01-29T00:00:00.000-05:00

Regina Lynn wish list for 2007:

You know what I hope? I hope 2007 starts with a bang and gets better from there.
I want to be swept up in a flood of new inventions designed to enhance pleasure, safety and intimacy. Sex-tech engineer Kyle Machulis (NSFW) has been dropping
hints about what he's been building and what he soon plans to do with it in
public. At least two new sex machines (NSFW) will be on display at the Adult Entertainment Expo, along with the usual assortment of gadgets.

I want 2007 to be the year when the populace put its beautifully pedicured foot down and says, "That's it, no more panicked television hosts whipping up furor about What Everyone Else Is Doing (and How Can We Stop Them)?" I'm hoping in 2007, no one will really care What Everyone Else Is Doing as long as it's informed, consensual and they aren't hurting anyone else.

Even if it involves the internet, a cell phone or a manatee costume.

In 2007, I want to see greater compassion for those who hold different viewpoints about sex -- in every direction. Can we build bridges between those who share "San Francisco values," which Violet Blue so elegantly describes in her Open Source Sex column, and those who don't? Between people who think bonk-chica-bow-bow ringtones are hilarious and those who think they're Satan's siren call?

Keep dreaming Regina, keep dreaming. You're one naive woman.

For the very busy and screwed-up male

2007-01-03T00:00:00.000-05:00

This sounds like a dumb service, but hey, there's a lot people out there who like this sort of stuff. If you're one of them, knock yourself out.

Submitted by Ilan, 40, from Non US

COMMENT: http://www.girlkeeper.com is a free service that helps you to be organized in love; manage all your relationships and avoid mistakes. Girlkeeper lets you create a profile for each of your girlfriends, reminders, important dates performance in the sack and more. Girlkeeper helps you keep each girl happy by reminding you occasional gestures just to show her you care. You can also share experience with others.

Library takes novel approach to romance

2006-12-21T00:00:00.000-05:00

CANBERRA (Reuters) - A 150-year old Australian public library has a new true-romance section after introducing speed-dating nights for lovers of classic texts.

The state library of Victoria in Melbourne introduced dating with a literary twist after the idea was raised at a staff party.

Those who attend must bring a book they either love or loathe as a conversation starter, ensuring there are no uneasy silences during the series of five-minute dates.

"It's speed dating with books. It's designed to bring book lovers together," the library's project manager, Jackie Felstead, told Reuters Wednesday.

The library's first event was quickly sold out with 52 book lovers taking part, and 13 couples linking up for further dates.

That's a pretty nifty idea. With creativity like this the Aussies will soon take over the world.

What Do Men Find Romantic?

2006-12-19T00:00:00.001-05:00

When it comes to romance, guys get a bad rap. The conventional wisdom is that they are an unromantic bunch, who'd rather chug a beer in front of the TV than sip champagne by candlelight. But men can be just as romantic as women, though they often express it in different ways. With the help of Matthew Milner, founder of GuyCritical.com... what makes men swoon.

1. Compliments. The quickest path to a man's heart is through his ego. "The other day, my lady told me she thought I was sexy. That was so cool! I'd never heard that before and it blew me away!" says a schoolteacher from Chicago. A political consultant from Washington, D.C. agrees: "The most romantic thing in the world is for you to be in awe of your man's skills -- whether it's his ability to make people laugh, perform at sports, fix things, or retrieve and display esoteric knowledge. Let him wow you," he says.

2. Dark chocolate. "Milk chocolate is for kids. Dark chocolate is for lovers," says Weinstein, who explains that dark chocolate has a higher percentage of cocoa, which means it has more phenylethylamine, a chemical that mimics the feeling you have when you're in love.

3. Hard-to-find gifts. Is his college sweatshirt so faded you can't decipher the name of his alma mater? Is he mourning the loss of a rare comic book that his mother threw away when he left home? Does he collect antique hood ornaments? Webb says that a gift that requires some effort is sure to be a big hit with your guy. "Men and women tend to express love differently. Women are usually the more nurturing types and tend to think of romance in terms of 'soft touches' while men express love in more practical ways," says Webb.

4. You, in his clothes. "Come to the dinner table wearing nothing but his button-down dress shirt. Now that's romance!" says an artist from Boston.

5. Funny movies. "A lot of people say that shared values or goals are what make a relationship work," says Weinstein. "But to me it's a shared sense of humor. If you like the Marx Brothers and your date doesn't, then it's simply not going to work," he says. "When you can find someone to laugh with, then you know you're really connecting."

6. A great memory. A picture really does paint a thousand words -- especially if it's of the two of you tanned and glowing at a beachside resort. "I went to my girlfriend's office and saw that she had a picture of us on vacation in Cancun," says a Seattle construction worker. "Little things like that just make you feel great."

7. An old-fashioned night on the town. A publisher in New York says that he isn't a huge romantic, but he admits that the rotating dance floor at the Rainbow Room makes him pretty gooey. "You're surrounded by well-dressed couples of all ages who know how to dance. This gives the effect of being in a romantic movie about old New York. Plus, it's a little disorienting with all that spinning around, which puts you in a dreamlike state," he says.

8. Tall buildings. Because in general guys just like big stuff. But also because taking in such a huge view can put life into perspective. "The tremendous view of the city with all its lights is not only awesome in its own right, but accentuates the essential smallness of the individual person," says a Chicago attorney. "Thus humbled, it is most comforting to realize, at that instant, you're not alone in the world."

9. Surprise intimacy. Whether it's an unexpected kiss or an afternoon jaunt to the bedroom, men swoon when women say "Come hither." "We like surprises -- like when you initiate sex at odd times, or rent a room in the middle of the day. We also like beaches, bed-and-breakfasts, and when you squeeze our thigh at a snooty dinner party. Oh, and baths. We like bubble baths," says a writer from New York.

10. P.S. I love you. They may not always admit it, but many men report that they love getting affectionate little notes. "I particularly like finding a note in my suitcase when unpacking on a business trip," says an executive from Dallas. Weinstein agrees. He loves getting a surprise note or email with an affectionate message, and says that a "p.s." increases the charm. "There's something about the p.s. that people respond to. It reminds us of when we were at camp and our mom wrote. P.S. I love you, or the note our high-school sweetheart stuffed into our locker."

What Do Men Find Romantic?

2006-12-19T00:00:00.000-05:00

Scam using match.com

2006-12-09T15:15:00.000-05:00

I don't know what kind of scam some people run on match.com, but I got quite a few emails from very attractive women, in their early 30's, from different countries, interested in men from 20 to 80. They have lousy typing skills, and of course, they're all crazy about me. Right.

OK, here's just one recent example, but there are many like this one. I'll just post some of the more "interesting" comments from "her" profile:

31-year-old woman from Ascot, Victoria, Australia seeking men 38-76 in United States

Height: 3'5" (105cms)

About me: i am kind, sencitive, honest and with good sence of humor

for fun: my favourite actor is will smith i relly like watching his movies alot.

my job: Yeah i am graduate just completed just completed nursing school and looking for job, but i wish to find my partner first.

my ethnicity: i am from victoria australia.

my religion: Yeah i am christian lkady and atend church on every sabath.

my education: i just completed with graduate degree in nursing field.

last read: yeah i read about things we should do for love, just about how to treat your partner love him and take care of him. i also read about how to slove problem with your partner if any so the third person wil not hear it.

Anyway, I'm inclined to answer one of these emails just to see where it goes. My guess is somewhere along the line they'll ask for money.

Dating services and member pictures

2006-11-21T00:23:00.000-05:00

When you join an online dating service, having good pictures will be a big plus. Match.com says your odds of getting contacted increase dramatically if you have pictures, and I believe them. I never even bother checking women without pictures.

But my experiences over the last two weeks has caused me to make some observations about pictures:

Studio Pictures: If you’re searching, coming across studio pictures is quite common. I’ve found that studio pictures show the person in a much more favorable way than everyday pictures. When there’s a combination of studio pictures and other photos, I have never found the person to look as good as the studio picture. So, if they only have a studio picture, I get skeptical.

Old pictures: Within my age group, it makes quite a different if a picture was taken in the last year or so versus 10 years ago. The other day I found a picture that was from 12 years ago (I could tell by the date on the picture). Come on! No one looks now like they did 12 years ago. So becareful with people who look much younger than their age.

Far away pictures: many people post lots of pictures but they are all from far away. Um… that raises a red flag to me.

Male cut out from the picture: I see lots of pictures of women where a male was cut out from the picture, but you can still see his hand around her waist or shoulder. Please! Take new pictures. I know that at my age every woman has had relationships, but I don’t want to be so vividly reminded. But there’s two things that really concern me about such pictures: one, if the pictures are recent, that means the woman hasn’t been away from the relationship long enough for me to want to get involved with her; or if the has been divorced for a while, those pictures are too old. Either way I look at it, it’s a bad sign.

Tags: dating, singles

Need a "Get Out Of Date Free" card?

2006-11-19T00:49:00.000-05:00

Last night I Stumbled Upon an awesome site for anyone having an iffy first date. Just go to GetMOOH (Get Me Out Of Here) and enter your phone number and the appropriate excuse. What ensues is pure genius. You don't even have to think of what to say, the guy coaches you through your responses. Next thing you know, you're off scot-free, your date none the wiser. Muahahhahah!

Tags: dating, singles

Registration with Match.com

2006-11-12T00:01:00.000-05:00

A few days ago I registered with match.com. I’m going to start posting some of my experiences here. Not so much specific personal stuff, and absolutely no names of anyone I may come in contact with (unless I’m confident we’re talking about a scam.) I’m more inclined to comment on the process and on common observations that probably apply to just about all-online dating services, not just match.com.

REGISTRATION

I first filled out a simple survey form asking for basic information (height, body type, religion, politics, education, etc.) and also included a few free-form fields for personal data. Most of the quiz is made up of these free form fields where you talk about yourself and what you expect from anyone you may want to pursue a relationship with.

After I submitted my profile and included pictures -- if you don’t include pictures your odds of getting responses are slim-- I did a search just to see what results I would get. At this point I had no intention of going any further with match.com.

But the following day I got an email from a woman. I could not read the email without subscribing. They offer a 3-day free trial period (you do have to supply a credit card and pick a plan even if you elect to cancel within the 3 days). So I decided to take the plunge and register so I could read the email.

Their My Match page is very simple and well organized. It allows you to add people as favorites and keeps track of who you emailed, who replied, and who's turn it is to write. If you add people to your favorites is then displays other people that match the one you added. You can also remove people from your searches so that they don't keep showing up.

Overall, a very easy process.

In the days ahead I’ll start posting some of the experiences plus anything new that might be of interest to anyone contemplating registering for such a service.

Tags: dating, singles

Potential Rapists Choose Their Victims in Advance

2006-11-03T10:44:00.000-05:00

[S]ome women who use online dating services have faced real danger when their suitor turns out be a sexual predator or rapist. Jeffrey Marsalis, a 33-year-old Philadelphia drifter accused of drugging and sexually assaulting seven women, is currently in jail and faces trial on eight counts of rape and other related charges... five of the alleged victims claimed that they met Marsalis through Match.com... The smooth-talking lothario was a master of guile when it came to luring the women. In e-mails or on the phone, Marsalis claimed he was a CIA agent, a confidential adviser to the president, a doctor or an astronaut-in-training. (He posted pictures of himself wearing medical scrubs, a suit and an astronaut's uniform on his Match.com profile, according to law enforcement sources)... When the women agreed to meet Marsalis in person at a restaurant or bar, he allegedly used the same technique on all of them: After the women left their drinks to go to the restroom, they'd describe later feeling sick and falling in and out of consciousness with vague recollections of being sexually assaulted and waking up in his bed. (Full story here)

The article is about "the perils of online dating". I think it's the perils of dating, period.

The women in this case took the precautions of meeting this guy in a public place, and yet, they were victims. It's very hard to blame them; some guys are just very smooth and if they have bad intentions, it's not easy to detect.

Tags: dating, singles

Anime Fan Seeks Same

2006-10-20T00:36:00.000-04:00

Tags: dating, singles

My current guy is a big time anime fan. He doesn't even watch regular TV anymore, and rarely goes to the movies. This is all fine with me, he's got his interests, and of course I have mine. I'm more into South Park, Harry Potter, sushi, 80's teen movies, my iPod, traveling, really all kinds of stuff. What initially attracted us was a common interest in music which is still there.

However, he is concerned about our long term potential because I'm not into anime the way he is. I've sat down and watched some shows with him, I even liked one enough to ask for a copy, but I guess I haven't gushed with adoration over his anime collection. He's worried that if we don't share in that interest that we won't be able to go long term. He even pointed out that he's been watching some of my things and tried to get into the things that I'm into. However, I never asked for that.

I'm not looking for a carbon copy of myself, I don't want to date my clone. If we like some of the same things that's great, but there's something to be said for time apart as well as time together. I think most successful couples have some common interests, but they also have a life outside their relationship. He worries that we won't be able to sit down and watch the same thing on TV, and my only concern is that he's unable to compromise.

I don't like feeling like I have to like anime, and that I have to like it in order to keep someone I care about around. I would never expect anyone I date to suddenly be as addicted to South Park and Harry Potter as I am, or to suddenly feign a liking for Bjork when I know they can't take her voice. I don't expect that out of a relationship, but am I deluding myself? How important are common interests to a successful relationship?

Class Teaches Men How to Woo Women

2006-10-15T00:21:00.000-04:00

By the end of their third date, Jay thought it was time. The first two dates had been wonderful. Julie seemed to get him, get his sense of humor, and really enjoy spending time with him. Their first time out, he had simply driven her to work in the morning — an hour-and-a-half commute from Fort Lee, N.J., to Manhattan, which gave them plenty of time to talk. A few nights later, they hopped around to a few different places and again had a great time.

"I just thought that, you know, by the third date, I should try to kiss her," says Jay, a salesman for an international transportation company. But when he leaned over, she turned away, leaving Jay bewildered and discouraged. After his divorce, most of his experiences "out there" had been awkward and frustrating, so he wondered, "Am I just not good with women?"

Jay's bewilderment drove him to seek answers — and a better "game." So, along with six other men in their mid-to-late 30s, Jay paid $1,600 to attend a "charm school," a three-day weekend boot camp in which a cadre of young and more socially successful men would teach them the secrets of wooing women. From the art of conversation to the subtle techniques of kinesthetics — or flirtatious touching — these seven men embarked on a quest to find their inner Adonis, to learn to be desirable, and then practice their skills in the night life of Manhattan.

Click here and follow their story. You might learn a thing or two.

Tags: dating, singles

The value of quality face time

2006-10-08T10:21:00.000-04:00

A sign of things to come? I hope so:

For some, it would be unthinkable -- certain social suicide. But Gabe Henderson is finding freedom in a recent decision: He canceled his MySpace account.

No longer enthralled with the world of social networking, the 26-year-old graduate student pulled the plug after realizing that a lot of the online friends he had accumulated were really just acquaintances. He's also phasing out his profile on Facebook, a popular social networking site that, like others, allows users to create profiles, swap message and share photos -- all with the goal of expanding their circle of online friends.

"The superficial emptiness clouded the excitement I had once felt," Henderson wrote in a column in the student newspaper at Iowa State University, where he studies history. "It seems we have lost, to some degree, that special depth that true friendship entails."

Across campus, journalism professor Michael Bugeja -- long an advocate of face-to-face communication -- read Henderson's column and saw it as a "ray of hope." It's one of a few signs, he says, that some members of the tech generation are starting to see the value of quality face time.

I've been saying this for a long time, both here and at Ask A Real Guy. While I believe that "'interpersonal intelligence' -- knowing when, where and for what purpose technology is most appropriate" -- can be a benefit to meeting people, it is so if he leads to face to face meetings.

Tags: dating, singles

Nine Ways to Meet a Man

2006-09-24T18:17:00.000-04:00

Kate White has an article about 9 ways to meet a man. Most of it is fairly typical, and with few exceptions, it's fairly good advice to guys as well. The first point merits some consideration because it's the most useful, in my opinion:

Don’t develop hard-and-fast rules about the ways you’re willing to go about your search. Some women, for instance, have a policy against being fixed up. But you need to be flexible and willing to experiment with a variety of strategies, particularly if you find yourself in a drought. My theory has always been that a winning prospect only comes around every six to seven blind dates, so you may have to chitchat with five chumps in order to get there. You also need to be flexible about the places you go to meet guys. If you head to the same bars all the time, you’re going to see the same old guys—or the same type. There are always interesting new ways to meet men, and you need to keep your ear to the ground to hear what’s hot at a given moment. It keeps changing. One minute networking cocktail parties are all the rage, and the next something else is. I heard lately, for instance, that day spas are starting to offer times when singles can mingle.

Tags: dating, singles

Christians and Divorce

2006-09-13T04:17:00.000-04:00

I saw this question and answer at a Christian Dating website:

BUT BABE, I'M A BRAND NEW GUY

Dear Professor Theophilus:
I have a question that admittedly concerns my love life — I know you don't like that kind of question — though it has brought up questions about my faith. I've been seeing a man for several months, whom I met through a mutual friend. He's a great guy who regularly attends church and shares most of my beliefs. However, many of my friends have advised me not to see him any more because of things they discovered about his past.
They haven't met him yet, but they've found out is that he has a daughter from a previous marriage and was partially, if not mostly to blame for the divorce (he wasn't physically unfaithful, but "emotionally unfaithful"). With me, he was upfront about all this from the beginning. After the divorce — about a year ago — he recommitted his life to Christ. My friends don't believe he could change, and I realize I sound like a dumb and desperate woman claiming that he has. But if I can't believe God has changed his life, what does that say about my belief in the power of God? It seems like my friends are saying that once someone has sinned, he's irreparably messed up. Of course, in theory, they deny this — but, well, it just seems that they are being unfair to this guy by not considering who he is now.
I know that they only have my best interests at heart, but I'm so confused. What do you think? Am I searching for the answer I want to hear instead of searching for the truth? Am I being unfair to ask my friends to reconsider the guy once they meet him? Does God still change lives dramatically? And how can you tell when such a change is for real?

Reply:
My dear, here is how to know whether the man has really changed. If he stops dating you and returns to the wife and daughter whom he has betrayed, then he has. If he doesn't, he hasn't. This isn't about whether he's a great guy, because whatever greatness there may be in him is pledged to his wife, not to you. Don't you know what he promised her? "Until we are parted by death." And don't you know what Jesus taught? "What God has joined together, let no man separate." That means no woman either.

Grace and peace, PROFESSOR THEOPHILUS

Wow. Christians can't/shouldn't divorce and if they do they are persona non grata to other Christians? I was surprised by the answer. Is this so?

There's an amazing set of assumptions made by this guy: 1) that the first marriage was joined by God. Maybe it wasn't. 2) That the wife wants him back. Maybe she doesn't. And if that's so, what then?

I'm also curious what she meant by he was "emotionally unfaithful" to his wife.

I don't meant to turn this into a religious discussion, I was more interested in the feedback about dating divorced men, this Q&A being just one opinion.

Tags: dating, singles

When distance bites!

2006-09-01T11:11:00.001-04:00

Tags: dating, singles

I'm very happy with my current relationship. We have a lot in common, and what's different about us compliments each other. But there's one thing that bites, the distance factor. I live in Orlando, and he is about 170 miles away. I have a car that gets excellent fuel mileage (yay for VW diesels) and he drives a Jag that gets 20 mpg on a good day. I don't mind driving out to see him, but the inbetween time is difficult.

Of course nowadays having a long distance relationship is much cheaper. Cell phones almost always have nights and weekends, plus he signed up for the same company I have, so we have the whole mobile to mobile calling. We can talk any time, day or night, and it doesn't cost us more than we'd normally pay for a cell plan. We can even send each other sweet little text messages. But time spent on the phone and online does not equal time spend in person. As much as we talk, we miss out on a lot. Sometimes my silences are filled with body language that he cannot see, cannot read. Body language, and time spent touching, not necessarily sexual, but just simple touch, holding each other, holding hands, kissing, and just hugging, cannot be expressed over the phone.

And the time we do spend together is somewhat stressful. Are we doing enough special things, are we doing enough simple things? Time spent together is almost always special because we don't get enough of it during the week. But by that same token, I don't want my trips to see him to be taken for granted.

So long distance is a tentative situation. At some point we're going to have to break the distance. Sooner better than later, really. With people meeting on dating sites, or meeting at conventions, or on vacation, or simply by chance (like us), there are more and more long distance relationships going on. Moreso than our previous generations, who were known to grow up, go to school, fall in love, marry, and often move back to hometowns. As much as I would love to be with someone local, I wouldn't trade my sweetie for anything.

Not for the faint of heart

2006-08-24T10:22:00.000-04:00

Tags: dating, singles

A lot of dating is really about taking chances. If you want to meet someone, if you want to find someone you really click with, it can take a lot of dating, going out there, meeting people, turning down offers and having people turn you down. It's all about trial and error. But what about once you find someone, and they feel similarly about you?

Then you're entering a relationship, and that's where things get tricky. That's where you feel the flutterings and cringes of your heart on a daily and sometimes hourly basis. You can't wait to be with them again, when they do the slightest thing, like call or text you, you feel all warm inside. You ache when they're not there, but you also worry just a little that it can't last. That someone can possibly care about you as much as they do, and want you, as you are, not as you present yourself.

The facade comes down, and let's face it, everyone has a little of a facade. When you start dating you, of course, put your best foot forward. But when you're in a relationship you start to let your partner get to know the real you, and that's not always pretty. In the back of your mind there's always that thought of, am I too weird for this person to handle? Am I too out there for anyone to handle?

Dating, relationships, it's not easy. But the rewards are ultimately indescribable. So what are you doing sitting here reading about dating? Get off your ass and get out there!

"Charm school" helps men perfect the pick-up

2006-08-19T00:01:00.000-04:00

Full article here:

Ben is not the only man with crippling fears when it comes to chatting up women. That's why Charm School, run by an Ann Arbor, Michigan-based company called Charisma Arts, has no problem finding men who need intense guidance and fieldwork approaching women at places like bookstores and bars.

"People think we're teaching guys with no confidence who are bad with women," said Charisma Arts co-founder Wayne Elise. "We teach guys how to be themselves in a very unnatural environment, how to cold approach strangers and make them comfortable enough to open themselves up."

Charisma Arts runs weekend Charm School seminars in New York, Los Angeles, San Francisco, London and Sydney. Some students find out about the course from the company's Web site, www.charismaarts.com.

The Charm School's lesson plan stays away from canned lines and instructs men to think on their feet when talking to women, to put their insecurities aside and react naturally to a women's subtle cues, said Johnny Saviour, 21, a Charisma Arts instructor.

The class starts on Friday afternoon with the instructors going over Elise's attraction theory. They then practice the theory by approaching each other as if they were women, and they do word association exercises to get their minds tuned into keeping a conversation with a woman rolling.

After a night approaching women at a bar or club, the instructors hold a debriefing the next morning and go over what the participants did right and wrong. Then they head out again to hit on more women.

I have no idea how much they charge or what results they get, but hey, some guys really do need all the help they can get.

Tags: dating, singles

Don't give up -- love is just a spell away

2006-08-15T00:07:00.000-04:00

So I clicked the Google ad for Love Spell Specialist:

My Name is Catherine Taylor I am licensed and certified psychic spritual
healer with over 27 years experience.

I help with rebuilding relationships, stopping confusion, blocking outside interference, reconnecting soul mates, stopping divorce, and preventing separation all without force or altering a persons free will. I perform powerful and effective love spells that will guarantee you a life time of ever lasting love and commitment.

Note: None Of My spells are powered By Voodoo,wicca, Hexes, or Black Magic

I'm posting this here so that next time you're talking to your friends and say you've tried everything to find love... we can say, no you haven't. :)

Come on... try the love spell. You know you want to.

Tags: dating, singles

Koroleva Anastasia, part 3

2006-08-07T00:08:00.000-04:00

T. says:

I got a response from my response to a bogus email you talk about here. What do you think is up with this? The email came from moscowlights.com where a name and password screen appears.

VictorM's comment:

I can't say for sure how this one con works, but the usual scam in this case is an exchange of emails with that Russian cutie (who's probably some guy in a basement somewhere) and at some point you get some really cute pictures, you start salivating over the prospect of saving this Russian beauty from her hard life. At some point she says she would like to meet you but doesn't have enough money for her passport, or pictures, or visa... whatever, and you send "her" $50 (some amount in this vicinity). And then it'll be the money for the plane tickets, etc. Of course, you never get to meet "her".

The stories are plenty of people who fell pray to this type of con. Don't fall for it. There is no such girl.

Tags: dating, singles