Submitted on Friday, July 25, 2008
By Lee, 31, from United States:

I broke up with my (now ex-) boyfriend because we were arguing all the time. A week after we broke up he contacted me again apologizing and started texting me every day and calling me telling me he missed me and wanted us to be together. We each had our family vacations for the next 2 weeks and didn't see each other. (he lives 1.5 hrs away from me). He had invited me to his family vacation, but the next day said it wasn't a good idea for me to come and then cut off all contact for 2.5 weeks. Out of the blue this past Monday he contacts me asking me how I am doing. I didn't reply and he started saying how he understands why I wouldn't want to talk and he is sorry he hasn't called. He said the reason was because his parents had "issues" regarding our arguments that we had been having prior to the break up. Now...keep in mind he is 38 yrs old. I told him he should have let me know what was going on and I assumed he wasn't calling because he didn't want to be with me. He kepts texting me he's sorry, he doesn't want me to be mad, it wasn't because he didn't want to be with me, blah, blah, blah. I asked him what he wanted to do now and he wanted to talk that night. We talked on the phone for over a hour...about normal stuff. Like we did when we were together. Nothing was said about the relationship. He said he would call me the next night but didn't. But he has text me a few times. What is up with this? Does he want to get together again and just being cautious and taking it slow or is he stringing me along? Or did he really just want to explain everything because he "hated how things were left"??

VictorM's advice:

I see nothing unusual about his behavior. You broke up with him, but I'm sure there's plenty of things about you that he likes, hence the contact. But at times he must question the wisdom of getting back together with a girl who broke up with him and with whom he fights far too often. The attempts to reach you and the distance all make sense to me.

I don't think he has a master plan to string you along; he's just confused between wanting you back and moving on.