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Sunday, May 04, 2008
Things got intense
Submitted on Wednesday, April 30, 2008
By Haley, 22, from Boston:
So...I just don't know what to think anymore about this guy I have been seeing. We started off just having a friends with benefits relationship. Things got intense...he started seeing another girl...I got mad and ended it. Well we ended up hooking up with eachother again...and we do having amazing sex. Anyways, I stayed over his house Saturday...went to breakfast in the morning. Then Sunday night he called me and asked me to come over. He was hysterical and upset about his brother who had passed away a year ago. I didn't know what to do...but I sat and listened and he thanked me. Do you think the crying in front of me means anything? Now him and his friends hate one of my best girlfriends. We got in a huge fight about it the other nite...and he said not to put her in the middle of me and him. I said okay. I called him today, and he said he wasn't mad at me. I am not talking to my friend right now because she called him one night screaming at him for talking about her and being mean to me. He's not mean to me...sometimes he is just odd and kiss me hello...other times he is all over me. During sex the other night he said he loved me but I don't think he realized it. We are not dating...I don't know what to do. I really like him...but I don't want to seem pushy. What do you think is up? PLEASE HELP ME!
VictorM's advice:
Crying about his brother was a spur of the moment reaction that has zero reflection on feelings for you.
Telling you that he loves you during sex does not mean that he loves you. It's another spur of the moment reaction.
Your chances of getting him interested in you besides sex will be very slim as long as he keeps getting sex from you under the current conditions. Guys like a girl that's an easy fuck but they won't respect her. And guys prefer a serious girlfriend they can respect.
By Haley, 22, from Boston:
So...I just don't know what to think anymore about this guy I have been seeing. We started off just having a friends with benefits relationship. Things got intense...he started seeing another girl...I got mad and ended it. Well we ended up hooking up with eachother again...and we do having amazing sex. Anyways, I stayed over his house Saturday...went to breakfast in the morning. Then Sunday night he called me and asked me to come over. He was hysterical and upset about his brother who had passed away a year ago. I didn't know what to do...but I sat and listened and he thanked me. Do you think the crying in front of me means anything? Now him and his friends hate one of my best girlfriends. We got in a huge fight about it the other nite...and he said not to put her in the middle of me and him. I said okay. I called him today, and he said he wasn't mad at me. I am not talking to my friend right now because she called him one night screaming at him for talking about her and being mean to me. He's not mean to me...sometimes he is just odd and kiss me hello...other times he is all over me. During sex the other night he said he loved me but I don't think he realized it. We are not dating...I don't know what to do. I really like him...but I don't want to seem pushy. What do you think is up? PLEASE HELP ME!
VictorM's advice:
Crying about his brother was a spur of the moment reaction that has zero reflection on feelings for you.
Telling you that he loves you during sex does not mean that he loves you. It's another spur of the moment reaction.
Your chances of getting him interested in you besides sex will be very slim as long as he keeps getting sex from you under the current conditions. Guys like a girl that's an easy fuck but they won't respect her. And guys prefer a serious girlfriend they can respect.
Comments:
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Question...when he called you over to talk about his brother, did you wind up having sex afterwards? If yes, then he probably just wanted the comfort and release of sex. If you did NOT have sex that time, then hey, That may be a sign that he thinks he can trust you enough to share some of his deeper feelings. Unless he randomly shares that stuff with just anyone. In that case, he's just a freakin' drama queen.
If you really like this guy, try to do more listening and less fucking - ask him questions about himself, his family, things he likes and cares about. The more he gets used to you as someone he can trust and talk to (and not just fuck) then the more likely he will start seeing you as a person, a friend, and maybe a serious candidate for girlfriend. IF that's what you want.
Then you can start fucking him again. ;)
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If you really like this guy, try to do more listening and less fucking - ask him questions about himself, his family, things he likes and cares about. The more he gets used to you as someone he can trust and talk to (and not just fuck) then the more likely he will start seeing you as a person, a friend, and maybe a serious candidate for girlfriend. IF that's what you want.
Then you can start fucking him again. ;)
# posted by 
: 6:17 PM
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