First, I love your bold answers! I had to read the past month plus just to see what advise you had been giving that I missed :) Almost p'd myself on a couple of them...

Anyway, I need your honest, man opinion. I had written you back in January, regarding my long distance relationship that my partner had not removed a woman from his messenger list after he had slept with her and we had broke up for it months before. Your reply was that the bottom line was cheating does not mean the end ..but the cheater better go way out of his and my guy was just not doing that.

Well, Victor, I had finally got him to understand it was her or me and have been hanging in there since that time. Things have not been great since then, I always was wondering what he was up to..I really didn't trust him. Long story short, I do believe he is somewhat narcissistic. I know we all are to a degree..but although never diagnosed..I believe him to be. He is very charming, life of the party, often misunderstood, unable to show his feelings well, robotic in expressions and replies..loved to turn the tables on you when you asked a tough question or would make a joke out of it until the topic was changed to something else. I told him he needed to get help for himself. That I had had enough. He (he is in his early 50's) swore that he has never loved anyone in his life like he loves me. He said he was going to therapy to find out why he hurts some one who he loves, especially me. I know my leaving him hurt him and I do feel badly for that. But I have to put my needs first. He was not giving me what I needed..he would take and take and never give back.

Here is my question to you...at the end, when he was trying to hold on..I asked him why he wanted to be with me. He replied, 1. Chemistry 2. I think about you all the time, 3. I want to be with you all the time, 4. Your smile brightens up my heart, 5. Your hug touches me to my core, 6. your kisses make my knees weak. So I replied and said, "in your list of why you want to be with me, nowhere did I hear because you love me" He replied, "all of it involves the love that we share". So I said, "you can have chemistry without the love". He said he disagreed. I just told him that every thing he said was about the chemistry and what I do for him..I didn't hear any "us" or "love" in their at all. I am just wondering..what is your read on his reply. I don't know why it is haunting me to know if this is guy talk..or is my interpertaion correct? Yes, I miss him, yes, I am missing what I THOUGHT we had. No..I will not go back to him again. BUT..I do wonder and hoped you could tell me your thoughts, Please! Thanks in advance, Victor!

VictorM's advice:

Based on his answers, I'd say this guy has no idea what loving someone is like, which is why it's easy to understand why he hurts those close to him. All six points he mentioned are trivial and reflect a purely physical relationship devoid of sentiment. Not only that, but that crap about your kisses making his knees weak is pure cheap romance novel drivel.

You are wise to stay away because it is possible that therapy will help him, but for someone like him it won't take a few sessions. I don't think it's enough for him to understand what love really is -- that in itself may be a significant task -- but even if he ever comes to understand, it's still a huge jump to expect him to actually feel that way about someone. The man is emotionally stuck in childhood. It's a long journey to grow emotionally from 5 to 50.