I met this guy approximately 2 months ago. He knew I was separated and he is also finalizing a divorce; we both have children and have been very upfront about our situations from the beginning. The day we met, we hit it off immensely and I invited him back to my house. We talked, made-out, no sex but talked until the early hours the next day. He went home and since then we talked every single day, multiple times per day not only phonecalls but including text messages, and talked until late night most nights.

The next date was 2 weeks later; which was understood from the beginning by me, due to location and time constraints, it's really not possible to see him more than that. We both knew that sex would happen because we have been very honest with each other about our needs, wants, and expectations. That Friday, he came over, spent the night. That Saturday, we met for coffee, spent the day together, spent the night together and he left early the next morning.

The third date, I decided to come to his place. We watched a movie, became intimate, went out later that evening and I left the next day.

In between those weeks, he made an effort to come see me one day out of that week, on his route for work, just to stop by and talk, hug and was extremely affectionate.

Things got a bit complicated with my ex soon after that third date and I told him about everything to keep him informed of how things were going with me. I did make it clear to him that if at any point he did not want to continue seeing me, that he could say so and I would not hold anything against him and we could move on. He did not say he wanted to stop seeing me, he eluded to wanting to continue seeing me.

So..since that last date, when I called, he would call back but that first week after that third date, he did not initiate phone calls anymore. He'll call back if I call and he is no longer allowed to text on his phone for work purposes. I told him I wouldn't text him anymore. He said, "Well, you could text, I could receive them but can't reply back." So every time I try to put a finality to the situation, he doesn't seem to want it done. He told me that the reason for him not calling as much was he has had a stressful work week and has had absolutely no time to do much more than sleep. He also mentioned that this week was going to be a lot of the same. So I left it as, "when you get 'unbusy', give me a call."

For 6 weeks, texting to tell me he misses me, that he really likes me, that he thinks about how it would be if we were together. He knows he can call me, what times are best and all that. So I have not called, it's been 3 days. This is the week that we would normally make a date to see each other on the weekend...so, I've already made plans to do other things but am still curious as to the thoughts of a man in this situation. Any input would be appreciated. Thank you so much!

VictorM's advice:

I'm sure every regular visitor to this site knows what's coming. This type of question is so common...

Guys are notorious for starting a relationship -- particularly when physical attraction is the main driver -- with lots of intensity. You are a mystery and guys love that. A couple of quick dates and a couple of sex sessions later, the mystery has vastly dwindled. Sometimes there are other attributes keeping the interest going but many times the interest simply fades.

In his case, the interest has faded. I say that because the excuse that he's too busy is far too common in these situations and the timing (a couple weeks into the relationship and after sex) makes it too much of a coincidence. When the "too busy" explanation comes after the fact, that is, after a period of silence and after being questioned about it, it's a good bet it's just an excuse for fading interest.

So why doesn't he tell you he's not interested instead of continuing to give you hints he wants to continue? Because: 1) he may feel it's a phase that will go away, so no point in burning any bridges; 2) he doesn't know how to explain the sudden loss of interest, so he doesn't; 3) he doesn't want to hurt your feelings, so he keeps saying things to prop up your ego (guys hate to come across as the bad guy); 4) he's hoping you get the hints and start fading way from him so he doesn't have to do it, all the while making you think he's interested.

Yes, it's a cowardly way of doing it but guys really hate to make a girl cry and have to explain something they don't know how to explain (the sudden loss of interest). So they hide, they evade, and they get "too busy".

(I should formalize this answer and just copy/paste it when this question comes up).

Anyway, you're doing the right thing by not staying at home and dwelling on it.