Submitted on Sunday, March 23, 2008
By marissa, 36, from danville:

I've been talkling to this guy off and on for about 2 years. We are very compatible and have alot of things in common. He said that he wasn't ready for a relationship so I respected that and kept it on a friendly level. He would call me on the phone and we would have good conversations even though we only talked for a few minutes. He stopped calling and I asked him why he said that I didn't call him so I started calling him but now instead of talking to him at night he only talks to me in the daytime and I'm the one who does all of the calling.We live 1 hr away from each other and he says that he wants to see me but I live so far and he doesn't feel like driving to see me. I'm confused because we went from a little something to nothing and I did not pressure him. Do you think he has found someone who is girlfriend material and doesn't want to tell me or did I read more into the situation. I'm gonna be in his town this weekend and I would like to drop in to say hi, is this appropriate. I just don't understand.

VictorM's advice:

You're just not getting it. He doesn't want a relationship WITH YOU. He's not into you. He's not interested in you.

Yes, in some ways it would be better if he came out and said it straight out so you'd know and moved on, but that's the way most guys are. They hate to say it straight to the woman's face, so they hint and hide and make excuses.

I have no idea if he found another woman or not but you you can safely assume that he's at least looking, because you're not the one.