My guy friend who disappeared is turning 21 on April 1st. My female friends said that if I'm interested in him romantically I shouldn't contact him because he disappeared on me, has given me the silent treatment, and he's probably playing games with me. What do you think? Should I message him? We were great friends for 5 months. Would it look desperate?

Another unrelated question:
I went to a fraternity party with a girl friend for the first time. The guys weren’t talking to me at first but as the night went by people were drinking and everyone was talking to each other. I'm not a big fan of drinking but I did have one in my hand. A guy came up to me and we started talking and eventually he asked me if I was single and how were my exes. I told him that "well, I never had anything serious." I didn't want to come out and say I never had a boyfriend, kissed or have sex, albeit I think he took it the wrong way and thought I was a swinger. So when guys ask me about past relationships what should I say?

PS I've written to you twice before with pictures. The submissions were on 3/22/08 and 3/24/08.

PSS My confidence come from knowing that I can achieve things and that I'm fun to talk to. Physical appearance wise, my mom (a model/business woman) said it's not important because it fades. I think that's why I'm never sure about my appearance.

VictoM's advice:

I think your female friends' advice is full of shit. If you're interested in the guy, try to make contact with him. Would it look desperate? Of course not; you'd just look interested, which is not a bad thing.

I don't believe the guy at the party thought you were a swinger. Your answer seemed pretty good to me and you should use it next time, unless you prefer to use "none of your business". :)

Your mom saying beauty is not important is like a filthy rich person saying money doesn't matter -- neither would want to part with what they've got. Beauty is not everything but it sure is nicer than being ugly to the bone. And it doesn't matter that it will fade, what matters is that during the peak of the dating stage of your life it is an asset in attracting mates.