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Wednesday, February 27, 2008
I have been single for about a year now and I'm ready to date
Submitted on Sunday, February 24, 2008
By Lydia, 19, from Texas:
HI. I have been single for about a year now and I'm ready to date, I've BEEN ready to date. Problem is, is that I'm a little shy, but when I do put myself out there I usually get hurt or rejected. I'm at the end of the line basically, almost completely given up. I mean, I'm no Victoria's Secret model, but hey I'm really pretty, yet I can't seem to even get a guy to look my way, and I just have to wonder, why in the world can't I get a guy to approach me or anything of that matter? It doesn't make sense and I'm so frustrated now. Help!!
VictorM's advice:
Get the hell out of Texas right now! There are far too many gorgeous women down there, parading around in their tight little shorts! The whole state is like a freaking beauty pageant!
OK... I'm kidding (kinda).
Getting hurt and rejected is part of the deal. It happens to everyone, sooner or later. Despite my joking above, chances are that you're much prettier than you think. Guys either go for you for the looks (hence the hurt) or they are intimidated by you and stay away. Break the cycle by asking mediocre looking guys out. Guys that you don't really care about but you consider a nice. They'll be happy to be in your company and you start sending out the vibe that you're in the dating mode.
You're a little shy, so you can ask a guy without really asking him. If there's a single guy in your circle of acquaintances, mention that you'd love to go see There Will Be Blood (or any movie or event) but would hate to go alone. There's a good chance the guy will volunteer.
You need to do more casual dating so that "hurt and rejected" will not be the end result. Eventually, you'll attract more guys to your liking.
By Lydia, 19, from Texas:
HI. I have been single for about a year now and I'm ready to date, I've BEEN ready to date. Problem is, is that I'm a little shy, but when I do put myself out there I usually get hurt or rejected. I'm at the end of the line basically, almost completely given up. I mean, I'm no Victoria's Secret model, but hey I'm really pretty, yet I can't seem to even get a guy to look my way, and I just have to wonder, why in the world can't I get a guy to approach me or anything of that matter? It doesn't make sense and I'm so frustrated now. Help!!
VictorM's advice:
Get the hell out of Texas right now! There are far too many gorgeous women down there, parading around in their tight little shorts! The whole state is like a freaking beauty pageant!
OK... I'm kidding (kinda).
Getting hurt and rejected is part of the deal. It happens to everyone, sooner or later. Despite my joking above, chances are that you're much prettier than you think. Guys either go for you for the looks (hence the hurt) or they are intimidated by you and stay away. Break the cycle by asking mediocre looking guys out. Guys that you don't really care about but you consider a nice. They'll be happy to be in your company and you start sending out the vibe that you're in the dating mode.
You're a little shy, so you can ask a guy without really asking him. If there's a single guy in your circle of acquaintances, mention that you'd love to go see There Will Be Blood (or any movie or event) but would hate to go alone. There's a good chance the guy will volunteer.
You need to do more casual dating so that "hurt and rejected" will not be the end result. Eventually, you'll attract more guys to your liking.
Comments:
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Yes, and those shorts seem...shorter than usual this year, too. ;P
Lydia, you're only 19! 19 is waaay too young to give up. Maybe the guys think you're already taken. Guys don't like rejection, either. So many times they are afraid to ask. You should try smiling directly at a guy that you like. Put on something pretty, slather some lip gloss on, and flash those pearly whites. Also, if you muster the courage to talk to him, stroke his ego a lot - ask him questions, find out what he's into, listen to him blather on and on about sports or movies or politics. Something he thinks he's an authority on. Haha.
Making him feel good about himself when he's around you is the best way to get that first date AND the best way to keep him on the hook.
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Lydia, you're only 19! 19 is waaay too young to give up. Maybe the guys think you're already taken. Guys don't like rejection, either. So many times they are afraid to ask. You should try smiling directly at a guy that you like. Put on something pretty, slather some lip gloss on, and flash those pearly whites. Also, if you muster the courage to talk to him, stroke his ego a lot - ask him questions, find out what he's into, listen to him blather on and on about sports or movies or politics. Something he thinks he's an authority on. Haha.
Making him feel good about himself when he's around you is the best way to get that first date AND the best way to keep him on the hook.
You are not on Ask A Real Guy's Home Page.
Click here to return to Ask A Real Guy's home page where you can submit your own question or read the most recent Questions+Answers.
