|
Our discussion forum is open for business. Come say hello. |
Thursday, February 14, 2008
He didn't want anyone to get hurt
Submitted on Monday, February 11, 2008
By Brittany, 24, from Arizona:
I am currently going through a divorce (ends 3/17) and there is this guy that I'm interested in that I have known since I was 10 and I have always had a crush on him. Well he has been talking with me via text and phone cause we live 45 minutes away and don't see each other much. I saw him for the first time in awhile the other day and we had a good time, he was teasing me and when I said something funny he would put his hand on my shoulder. We were hanging out with a group of people. I'm trying to figure out if he is interested or not. I told him by text that I was interested in getting to know him better but definitely didn't want a relationship at this time. He didn't respond, but he still continued to talk to me about other stuff. I get mixed signals from him. I also am trying to figure out what he meant by one of his text messages where I said that this other guy didn't make me smile like he does and he responded with if you only knew! I thought that was good but..I can't figure him out. I don't know if it's just given my situation with the divorce and the fact that are families are friends. He also said that he has thought about hanging out sometime but couldn't help slight awkward feeling. The other thing is that I usually initiate conversation. So I don't know. He's just throwing mixed signals all around. I told him all I wanted to know was if he was interested or not and to not worry about hurting my feelings. He won't text back to my messages about this, but will talk to me about other stuff. Also when I talked to his buddy he told me that he wasn't going to let the guy I like know he had my number cause he didn't want anyone to get hurt. So I'm just confused. I did ask him to an event, but he can't go cause he is having a procedure done and will be on crutches. (which I know this is true)
VictorM's advice:
No, he's not sending you mixed signals. He's just being friendly and sympathetic to your situation. You're the one jumping to conclusions for no good reason.
You hardly see him, he lives 45 minutes away, you're not even divorced yet, and you're already asking him if he's interested? Talk about putting the cart before the horse.
Frankly, I think you spooked him and he's avoiding you now. And I can't say that I blame him.
By Brittany, 24, from Arizona:
I am currently going through a divorce (ends 3/17) and there is this guy that I'm interested in that I have known since I was 10 and I have always had a crush on him. Well he has been talking with me via text and phone cause we live 45 minutes away and don't see each other much. I saw him for the first time in awhile the other day and we had a good time, he was teasing me and when I said something funny he would put his hand on my shoulder. We were hanging out with a group of people. I'm trying to figure out if he is interested or not. I told him by text that I was interested in getting to know him better but definitely didn't want a relationship at this time. He didn't respond, but he still continued to talk to me about other stuff. I get mixed signals from him. I also am trying to figure out what he meant by one of his text messages where I said that this other guy didn't make me smile like he does and he responded with if you only knew! I thought that was good but..I can't figure him out. I don't know if it's just given my situation with the divorce and the fact that are families are friends. He also said that he has thought about hanging out sometime but couldn't help slight awkward feeling. The other thing is that I usually initiate conversation. So I don't know. He's just throwing mixed signals all around. I told him all I wanted to know was if he was interested or not and to not worry about hurting my feelings. He won't text back to my messages about this, but will talk to me about other stuff. Also when I talked to his buddy he told me that he wasn't going to let the guy I like know he had my number cause he didn't want anyone to get hurt. So I'm just confused. I did ask him to an event, but he can't go cause he is having a procedure done and will be on crutches. (which I know this is true)
VictorM's advice:
No, he's not sending you mixed signals. He's just being friendly and sympathetic to your situation. You're the one jumping to conclusions for no good reason.
You hardly see him, he lives 45 minutes away, you're not even divorced yet, and you're already asking him if he's interested? Talk about putting the cart before the horse.
Frankly, I think you spooked him and he's avoiding you now. And I can't say that I blame him.
Comments:
You are not on Ask A Real Guy's Home Page.
Click here to return to Ask A Real Guy's home page where you can submit your own question or read the most recent Questions+Answers.
This follow-up comment was submitted by Brittany:
I was afraid of scaring him off, yet it was so hard for me to withhold my feelings since I have had a crush on him for so long just never got up the nerve before and now I basically screwed it up given the situation I am in. You are right though and really I don't blame him either..I guess my question now..is there something I could do to possibly fix the situation, like giving it time or did I probably ruin all opportunities?
I was afraid of scaring him off, yet it was so hard for me to withhold my feelings since I have had a crush on him for so long just never got up the nerve before and now I basically screwed it up given the situation I am in. You are right though and really I don't blame him either..I guess my question now..is there something I could do to possibly fix the situation, like giving it time or did I probably ruin all opportunities?
I'd say all is not lost. Keep your distance, at least until your divorce is final. That doesn't mean you have to avoid him but you should back off. Treat him as you would any other friend and give him time to get used to the idea that you'll be an available woman.
Post a Comment
You are not on Ask A Real Guy's Home Page.
Click here to return to Ask A Real Guy's home page where you can submit your own question or read the most recent Questions+Answers.
