* he's a free spirit, very adventurous, can be stereotyped as "not the marrying type"
* he's into younger girls (1st girlfriend: 5 years age gap, 2nd:9 years, 3rd: 10)
* he's only had 3 serious relationships
* his last relationship with fiance ended 3 years ago. His life was a wreck since then (he cut his long hair, he's been drinking every night, etc.)

A month ago he told his friends that this year he's gonna be with someone (me)and that we're gonna be together for a long time but we don't call each other boyfriend-girlfriend because we don't like labels (but he didnt even ask me about it!).

We act like we're in a relationship (I can demand for things, we see each other often, etc.) Also, we call each other honey (that's his endearment for his ex too when they were together..now, if he's calling me HONEY, does that mean a.) he's still not over her b.) he considers having a serious relationship with me (or are we having one already?) c.) it's just his favorite..insights please:).

I want things to be spontaneous and I don't like having THE talk because I'm afraid it would ruin the whole thing or it would scare him away. Is there a way to get my answer without having the serious talk?

VictorM's advice:

The "honey" term of endearment is answer C. The usage of that word probably has more to do with his personality than it does with the feelings for any one girl. I really don't think it has nothing to do whether he's over his ex, even if I don't believe he is. After all, his life wouldn't be a wreck if that break-up wasn't traumatic. He's not ready for another committed relationship, hence his answer to his friends.

Based on his own experiences, even being engaged still was no assurance that he would "live happily ever after." So having "the talk" really means nothing to him. By contrast, five months is nothing, so don't expect a major declaration of love from him about where things might be.

Are you girlfriend material for this guy? Who knows. You could be. But you're not yet. That much is clear.