Well, I have a big problem dealing with my mom and my boyfriend. See, I've been going out with
him for almost a year and three months. This whole time, my mom had no idea. Actually she found out about it and went crazy. She's a very strict person and doesn't like me dating. She also has trust issues with me. I just want her acceptance for my boyfriend but she just flat out hates him. He's kind of a trouble maker but he has such a great side too. And most of the time, he just likes to play around. He's a great guy but my mom only sees his bad sides. I don't even know why she won't just give me a chance. I hate lying to her about this and if she just gave it a chance I know things would be better. I also do so good in school already. Straight A's and have never failed anything in my life, Valedictorian of Elementary, top 5 in middle school and now on the principle's list of highschool. (sorry to sound boastful) She says that the problem is my attitude and the fact that she can't trust me, but the ONLY reason why I give her attitude is basically because she won't give me a chance with this guy. I have never cared for a guy so much and would not have gone through all the trouble just to be with him. I was thinking of talking to her about him and compromising and agreeing to something, but more than half of me knows she won't agree. I'm afraid she'll just shut me off and get angry with me. But, I want to take the risk because she might come to understanding what I mean and feel. Do you think by talking to her and having a conversation with her about this will make her find me more mature and sincere? Or will it just end in a total wreck with her being all angry?

I really like this guy. I know he's not using me for anything or just wanting to have a girl. He really cares for me. I want to tell my mom this but I don't think she'd take me seriously. She might just laugh at my face and then get mad. How can I get her to understand and finally approve of this?

VictorM's advice:

Come on Stephanie, everyone has a good side. Even Hitler felt sorry for his dog when he had him killed. I'm not saying your boyfriend is a rotten guy, but I can understand why your mom focus on his bad side; that is the side to worry about.

You have been lying to your mother for over a year and now you want her to trust you? Trusting is very hard to do when you have been lied to. Your mom isn't about to be played the fool willingly.

If you approach your mom in a confrontational way and expecting to get all you want, you will lose. If, however, you are willing to be smart and realize that you may have to give a lot to get you on a path of trust with her, it could be positive. There is technique that I often advise here for exactly this type of conversation. Read this Question and Answer. It's not exactly your situation but close enough. Write back if you have more questions.