|
Our discussion forum is open for business. Come say hello. |
Sunday, December 30, 2007
He dumped me for another girl
Submitted on Saturday, December 29, 2007
By Megan, 21, from Boston:
A while ago I was dating this guy. I liked him a lot. However, he dumped me for another girl. He kept in touch during the time he was dating her, and he always asked if he could visit me and see me. Now he tells me that he made a mistake and picked the wrong girl. He broke his own heart the day he let me go. He also said he could really see himself with me. Then he broke down almost in tears because he is leaving for the army in a few months. But he said that we could write to each other and talk on the phone, and he gets leaves and will come visit. I am honestly at a loss here with what to do. I still care for him very much. But I don't know if I can trust him. Any advice?
VictorM's advice:
I think he means what he says, but don't be fooled by that. Finding that the other girl was the wrong one doesn't make you all of a sudden the right one. There's a reason he was willing to drop you and that reason hasn't changed, even if he can't put his finger on it. He's coming back to the familiar and comfortable, not the passionate, a common reaction for guys in limbo. If you didn't light him up with passion before, why would you now?
You'd be wiser to spend your time looking for a guy who is seriously into you and you into him, instead of wasting your time with one who is just in need of some temporary comfort and that you no longer trust.
By Megan, 21, from Boston:
A while ago I was dating this guy. I liked him a lot. However, he dumped me for another girl. He kept in touch during the time he was dating her, and he always asked if he could visit me and see me. Now he tells me that he made a mistake and picked the wrong girl. He broke his own heart the day he let me go. He also said he could really see himself with me. Then he broke down almost in tears because he is leaving for the army in a few months. But he said that we could write to each other and talk on the phone, and he gets leaves and will come visit. I am honestly at a loss here with what to do. I still care for him very much. But I don't know if I can trust him. Any advice?
VictorM's advice:
I think he means what he says, but don't be fooled by that. Finding that the other girl was the wrong one doesn't make you all of a sudden the right one. There's a reason he was willing to drop you and that reason hasn't changed, even if he can't put his finger on it. He's coming back to the familiar and comfortable, not the passionate, a common reaction for guys in limbo. If you didn't light him up with passion before, why would you now?
You'd be wiser to spend your time looking for a guy who is seriously into you and you into him, instead of wasting your time with one who is just in need of some temporary comfort and that you no longer trust.
Comments:
Post a Comment
You are not on Ask A Real Guy's Home Page.
Click here to return to Ask A Real Guy's home page where you can submit your own question or read the most recent Questions+Answers.
You are not on Ask A Real Guy's Home Page.
Click here to return to Ask A Real Guy's home page where you can submit your own question or read the most recent Questions+Answers.
