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Tuesday, October 30, 2007
When I talk to him about personal things he freezes up
Hanna, 16, from u.s.a., asks:
My guy is so romantic but sometimes when I talk to him about personal things he freezes up. How am I supposed to handle a guy that's so shy?
VictorM's advice:
That's not being shy; that's being a guy. Not all guys are like that, but the majority is. It's just one of those things that makes most guys quite different from girls.
Stay away from topics that are too personal and focus on topics that you know he likes and knows a lot about. Trust takes time to build and that needs to happen first before he gets more personal with you. Listen attentively and seriously to the things that are important to him and you may yet get him to talk about things that are important to you. But that's not going to happen right away.
My guy is so romantic but sometimes when I talk to him about personal things he freezes up. How am I supposed to handle a guy that's so shy?
VictorM's advice:
That's not being shy; that's being a guy. Not all guys are like that, but the majority is. It's just one of those things that makes most guys quite different from girls.
Stay away from topics that are too personal and focus on topics that you know he likes and knows a lot about. Trust takes time to build and that needs to happen first before he gets more personal with you. Listen attentively and seriously to the things that are important to him and you may yet get him to talk about things that are important to you. But that's not going to happen right away.
Comments:
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Guys are like squirrels. They want the nut you're offering, but they don't trust you to not catch 'em and stuff 'em in a cage. So they're skittish.
Look: feed the squirrel lots of nuts, and then after a long time, he'll trust you. Or get so fat that he can no longer move.
THEN you can stuff him in cage!
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Look: feed the squirrel lots of nuts, and then after a long time, he'll trust you. Or get so fat that he can no longer move.
THEN you can stuff him in cage!
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