Sarah, 17, asks:

I was seeing a guy for 2 months, and we broke up for 2 reasons: 1. He didn't want to go to college in a relationship, and 2. I wouldn't have sex with him.

I really like him though, and what makes it even harder... we have the same group of friends.

A friend of mine scumbagged me and we are no longer talking. She has been calling my ex non-stop. She is very afraid of me. Tonight was the first night our group spent time together and I was going to kill her. I told our mutual girlfriend to keep her in check, and she tried. My ex is a spiteful guy, and he flirts with my friends to get me mad. He can't get over the fact that I met someone new the day after we ended it. That person is someone I am not with, but my ex has no idea.

I still like him. A lot. I don't show that it bothers me when he flirts with my friends, but it really does. I do not know what to do anymore or how to act. I want him for myself, or I want him to stop being spiteful and just admit he still has strong feelings for me like I do for him. This girl that he is flirting with is a slut and a druggie. Something he never goes for. We are both complete opposites of her. We come from conservative families and he loved the fact that I am not slut or a druggie.

The sad part is, while all of this is happening, his best friend from a different country is rubbing my leg under the covers. I hate it. I don't want anyone but him.

What do I do?

VictorM's advice:

Let's see, he's going to college and doesn't want a relationship with you. There's nothing you can do about that. He wants sex with you but you're not ready. But even if you had sex with him it wouldn't change reason number one. So no matter how you slice it, no matter what feelings he may still have for you, he's ready to move on.

You want him to admit he has strong feelings for you. Why? First, there's a very good chance that he doesn't feel that way about you, and second, what difference would it make? He's going away and wants to be free to chase the "sluts and druggies" (your words, not mine) that you think he doesn't. What, is the girl he's flirting with putting a gun to his head? No. He wants wilder girls and he knows he's going to find them in college. You think he doesn't want such girls but you're wrong. Don't believe me? Then tell me, why did you listed reason number two as a cause of the breakup?

Find another circle of friends until he's gone. And get over your illusion that he wants a girl like you -- he doesn't! Not yet anyway. And maybe you'll find out that being spiteful is not such a great quality in a guy.