jen, 19, from NY, asks:

I am getting over him pretty well I mean it is hard because there was a short time where I did like him…but I shot that down quick. I mean what can I do currently? He doesn’t extend anything to me but does to our friend. Is it my job to show him some interest before he can?

Yes it did get me to notice but I never let him onto it too much. I did not start acting distant until he started acting like an ass. I can't chase someone that wants me for an ego boost until/if our friend becomes single! I don’t want to be a second choice when I can be someone’s first and only! I got along with his friends more and don’t think that went over too well. I got the feeling that he was still in middle school emotionally. Over the year, he would follow our friend around like a puppy. (Of course she didn’t mind it was a great ego boost to her.) I guess he lives in a fairytale where he and our friend will live happily ever after…if he just keeps calling her and sitting next to her and giving her little trinkets of affection (the thing is we all give each other lil things all the time! But he only gives to her…and a few times me…)? Another friend that knows of his crush would notice that sometime he would get these bouts of depression and just sit next to his crush waiting for her to ask what’s wrong? And she would…but if her boyfriend was there she wouldn’t…that would be a slap in the face and he would just stare longingly and say they aren’t really in love/serious. How can someone be in love with someone that has never been single to them?

VictorM's comment:

To quote a song... He's "dreaming the impossible dream. " That's the fantasy lots of people live in. It's not easy to shake that feeling when you're so hooked on another. He's just going to have to deal with the heartache somehow.

Whatever happens between them, it seems you're out of the picture. The coast is clear for you.