MO, 26, from Florida asks:

My boyfriend of two years has a friend who is a girl who he calls every single day and talks to her for hours at a time. She's in love with him and sent him text messages about her feelings and how she can't wait to see him. She lives in MI. Anyway, when I approached him about the issue he said they're just friends. So why won't he leave me alone after I said we should break it off so he could decide what he wants. But yet every night they must speak or it's like the end of the world for him.

VictorM's advice:

Ultimatums are generally a bad idea. A much better idea is for you to express your feelings about the situation without pointing any accusatory fingers. Stick to what you feel about the his calls to her. If it makes you jealous, say so. If you don't like it, so say. If you wish for him to pay much less attention to her, say so. By doing this, you don't get into the finger pointing or accusations that may be false. Really, it does NOT matter what he thinks their relationship is; it matters how you feel about it. If he's not the type of guy to place your feelings above hers, then you clearly have the wrong guy.

The situation, as you describe, sounds odd. Your boyfriend is wrong to continue the friendship after her expressions of love for him and your displeasure. He's being unfair to you and to her.

I don't buy that this kind of behavior between them is pure friendship. He may not want to let you go because at least you're there and he can get physical satisfaction from you, but his inability or unwillingness to put some distance between himself and the girl is mighty dumb, even suspicious. It certainly casts doubt about how into you he is.

Try an experiment. Tell him you won't be seeing him for a while but you'd love to talk to him on the phone for hours. I'd be curious how receptive he would be to this suggestion.

Tags: female best friend, boyfriend calls girl, they're just friends