Princess, 23, from USA asks:

I recently found 2 incest links bookmarked on my boyfriend of 5 month's Netscape bookmarks. Since 1 of the links is for an incest forum which is no longer in service, I believe that he saved those links before we met. Could my boyfriend have a disgusting fetish that I don't know about? And if so, how could I approach him about it without making it obvious that I didn't respect his privacy? I think I have a right to know.

VictorM's advice:

I agree that you have a right to know. But consider that it's possible he was acting out of curiosity, not a fetish. There may be other reasons, such as they were bookmarked by a friend. All I'm saying is, have an open mind as you address this.

Whether you like it or not, most guys have an adventuresome attitude about such things. For most guys, visiting such forums, or viewing porn, is no big deal. There is no emotional attachment to such actions. We view it, we move on. It's no big deal.

Incest, for whatever it's worth, is a common male fantasy. Watching twin sisters engaging in incest is often a joke in teen comedy movies. Do we expect it to happen? No. But males are wired to have very wild and far out fantasies.

If you are concerned that he might be interested in incest within his own family, of course I can't rule it out. I just don't know. But to make that jump based on this information is really far fetched. Like I said, fantasies with incest are very common precisely because they are not the norm in real life.

If you were using his computer with his permission than you didn't violate his privacy. But in any case, at this point, your peace of mind is much more important than his privacy. So ask him about the links. Just don't do it in an accusatory tone of voice. Give him all the benefit of the doubt and consider what I said above before you make a final judgment.

Labels: boyfriend, incest, sexual fantasy