merline, 34, from florida asks:

My boyfriend and I have know each other for over a year. We have been dating for 10 months. I have handled our relationship with care, so has he. I waited to sleep with him and he agreed to wait until I was ready. We have been building a really good relationship, our friendship has been maintained also. On my side we have had many close calls, times I almost scared myself out of the relationship. He wouldn't have it. Whenever I have a problem with something he did or didn't do, said or didn't say, he always knows what to say to defuse the bomb in my insecurity. I have taken the safety he offers me to voice what is bothering me. He is always patient. I love that about him. I realized that he loved me. Then I realized I loved him. I find it easy to tell him. He likes and accepts my love. The thing is he is silent but speaks with actions. I always feel loved by him. He has been this way from the beginning. He buys me gifts, ask for my opinions on things, and he is super affectionate, alone or with people around. He always compliments me and he makes me feel important to him. I sometimes wonder how he does it, especially when he is so busy all the time. The calls have gotten low sometimes but at soon as I let him know they pick up. I know that he loves me. He even said it. Later he made it seem as if he didn't mean to say it. I almost believed him and dumped him, until he let me know that his actions tell, I should not long for the words. That is true. I can appreciate that most men will say what you want to hear, and do the opposite, I have a guy that is always showing me his love. Even when he thinks I am being "crazy". Since he said it, I made the mistake of bringing attention to it and that is when he gave me the turn around. A few weeks after that he said he believes we fit each other, that we think alike and meld really well together. He echos my thoughts always. we decided that we were a team. when he said this to me it meant more than a mere, I love you. It meant he feels just as comfortable with me as I do him. He even said there is no reason for him to look for someone more suitable that I suit him fine. What do you thinks? Are these good signs to you?
Does it seem like a solid way to start a relationship to you. thanks

VictorM's answer:

I only know of two perfect guys; you seem to have found the other one.

You have a solid star and a fantastic relationship already. Seriously, guys like the one you describe are very rare.

It bothers me a little that you still feel insecure enough to even ask. I mean, how much more perfect does a guy have to be? I hope you don't go spoiling things with too many demands. Insecurity of your kind can be handled, and your guy seems to be doing great, but it can also become a royal pain in the ass after a while. Use, but don't abuse, "the safety he offers" for you to speak your mind.

Anyway, good luck and relax, be happy.

Labels: relationship