Tuesday, October 03, 2006
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
Johnny, 15
Colorado
Asks:
Hey, I've got to ask you this. My girlfriend has been in countless relationships with other guys and this is only my second. My first I never kissed the girl because we were younger and it never really came to that. Now that we are older it has sort of become expected that we kiss. And I think she wants me too, but I can't bring myself to do it. I want to also, it just seems impossible for me to get myself to do it. I also know that in her past relationships she has kissed many times, perhaps even more than just kissing on the cheek or lips. So how do I kiss a girl without feeling stupid? Thank you very much.
Lee's Thoughts:
Well Johnny, you start slow and easy. *Baby steps*...if you will.
Do you hold hands with her? That's a great way to start getting physical with her and get comfortable with it. Hold her hand. Then, you can move to the good 'ole arm around the waist. This works while you are walking or standing. Next is hugging. Hug her when you're happy. Hug her when she's sad. Hug her whenever you feel like it. Again, this will get you more comfortable with merging your personal space.
Next, after the hug, go for a quick peck on the cheek. The NEXT time, sllloww that quick peck down and lightly brush your lips across her cheek, lingering for a bit.
THEN, you go for the sweet, soft (closed mouth) kiss. You can do this when saying goodbye, so you can just walk away afterwards. The closed-mouth kiss can send JUST as much electricity down a girl's spine as the sloppy tongue one.
The shift from closed-mouth to frenching is clear but subtle. You want a nice soft LINGERING closed-mouth kiss that seems to ask for more. DO NOT shove your tongue in her mouth...ICK! You just kiss her lips and wait for her lips to part slightly to show that she's ready for the real thing. Then, you can go for it (GENTLY!).
The key is to be sweet and gentle. Hold her with your arms and everything will fall into place. Don't rush it. The first kiss is the most scary...but once you get that over with, it will feel completely natural.
GOOD LUCK!!
Colorado
Asks:
Hey, I've got to ask you this. My girlfriend has been in countless relationships with other guys and this is only my second. My first I never kissed the girl because we were younger and it never really came to that. Now that we are older it has sort of become expected that we kiss. And I think she wants me too, but I can't bring myself to do it. I want to also, it just seems impossible for me to get myself to do it. I also know that in her past relationships she has kissed many times, perhaps even more than just kissing on the cheek or lips. So how do I kiss a girl without feeling stupid? Thank you very much.
Lee's Thoughts:
Well Johnny, you start slow and easy. *Baby steps*...if you will.
Do you hold hands with her? That's a great way to start getting physical with her and get comfortable with it. Hold her hand. Then, you can move to the good 'ole arm around the waist. This works while you are walking or standing. Next is hugging. Hug her when you're happy. Hug her when she's sad. Hug her whenever you feel like it. Again, this will get you more comfortable with merging your personal space.
Next, after the hug, go for a quick peck on the cheek. The NEXT time, sllloww that quick peck down and lightly brush your lips across her cheek, lingering for a bit.
THEN, you go for the sweet, soft (closed mouth) kiss. You can do this when saying goodbye, so you can just walk away afterwards. The closed-mouth kiss can send JUST as much electricity down a girl's spine as the sloppy tongue one.
The shift from closed-mouth to frenching is clear but subtle. You want a nice soft LINGERING closed-mouth kiss that seems to ask for more. DO NOT shove your tongue in her mouth...ICK! You just kiss her lips and wait for her lips to part slightly to show that she's ready for the real thing. Then, you can go for it (GENTLY!).
The key is to be sweet and gentle. Hold her with your arms and everything will fall into place. Don't rush it. The first kiss is the most scary...but once you get that over with, it will feel completely natural.
GOOD LUCK!!
