Monday, July 24, 2006
Masturbating in your sleep
This submission came via the Contact Us page from Anonymous:
I have a friend who is 40 + yrs. of age and sleeps nude, but is starting to feel guilty. This person would like to know if there are advantages to sleeping nude, and while this person sleeps, he/she wakes up with his/her hands sometimes between his/her legs. Is this person masturbating in his/her sleep? If he/she does masturbate as others do in his/her sleep, how is this a proven fact? This person is Catholic and the Catholic Church frowns on masturbation, so if he/she has been sleeping nude for the past 30 years and a good percent masturbating during that sleep time, and being frowned on by the Church, Is he/she destined to hell?
VictorM's answer:
I'm posting this here in hopes that others will use the Visitor Comments section. I'm not qualified to answer this from a religious point of view, but since I was raised Catholic, I'll put my two cents in.
Sleeping nude, as far as I can recall, is not a sin in any way. For some people, any kind of clothing becomes constrictive. If they move a lot in their sleep, clothing can choke them or make it plain uncomfortable. So, nude is fine. And while masturbation is a no-no, doing so in your sleep is a "reflex", not punishable with a sin. A reflex is not "willful thought". Well, that's how it was relayed to me when I a kid. I trust the rules haven't changed. Of course, as a kid, it was also an unwritten rule that when your eyes were closed, you were technically asleep. :)
So Hell need not be your friend's destination unless there are other sins involved.
Now, if you allow me a bit of humor, I'll give a very much paraphrased version of Father Guido Sarducci (from Saturday Night Life) take on all this.
He says that life is like a bank. You do good deeds, and "money" gets deposited in your behalf. You commit a sin, and a withdrawal occurs. The object is to die with a positive value in the bank. So, say you walk a little old lady across the street, you get $5. If you commit murder, you get $5,000 taken out. Masturbation was valued at 25 cents.
So... as long as you don't drop a rock on someone's head on purpose, if you walk a little old lady across the street, you can masturbate 20 times... with your eyes open.
OK... now someone please give this person some informed opinion.
I have a friend who is 40 + yrs. of age and sleeps nude, but is starting to feel guilty. This person would like to know if there are advantages to sleeping nude, and while this person sleeps, he/she wakes up with his/her hands sometimes between his/her legs. Is this person masturbating in his/her sleep? If he/she does masturbate as others do in his/her sleep, how is this a proven fact? This person is Catholic and the Catholic Church frowns on masturbation, so if he/she has been sleeping nude for the past 30 years and a good percent masturbating during that sleep time, and being frowned on by the Church, Is he/she destined to hell?
VictorM's answer:
I'm posting this here in hopes that others will use the Visitor Comments section. I'm not qualified to answer this from a religious point of view, but since I was raised Catholic, I'll put my two cents in.
Sleeping nude, as far as I can recall, is not a sin in any way. For some people, any kind of clothing becomes constrictive. If they move a lot in their sleep, clothing can choke them or make it plain uncomfortable. So, nude is fine. And while masturbation is a no-no, doing so in your sleep is a "reflex", not punishable with a sin. A reflex is not "willful thought". Well, that's how it was relayed to me when I a kid. I trust the rules haven't changed. Of course, as a kid, it was also an unwritten rule that when your eyes were closed, you were technically asleep. :)
So Hell need not be your friend's destination unless there are other sins involved.
Now, if you allow me a bit of humor, I'll give a very much paraphrased version of Father Guido Sarducci (from Saturday Night Life) take on all this.
He says that life is like a bank. You do good deeds, and "money" gets deposited in your behalf. You commit a sin, and a withdrawal occurs. The object is to die with a positive value in the bank. So, say you walk a little old lady across the street, you get $5. If you commit murder, you get $5,000 taken out. Masturbation was valued at 25 cents.
So... as long as you don't drop a rock on someone's head on purpose, if you walk a little old lady across the street, you can masturbate 20 times... with your eyes open.
OK... now someone please give this person some informed opinion.
Comments:
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While it IS hard to argue the correctness of an SNL character, Victor, I'm gonna try my best.
First of all, you CANNOT feel guilty for what you do in your sleep. When I was pregnant, my husband would wake up to me screaming like a sailor, cursing everybody and their mother. Do I remember this? Nope. Do I feel guilty? Absolutely not.
Second--masturbation. Such a sensitive subject. I went to a youth leaders confernec several years ago where this was a topic in one of the workshops--how do we talk to teens about it? It was great, really. The guy moderating it didn't give a yes or no answer. The bible does not day anything for or against masturbation. There's a scripture, I belive in Genesis about "wasting seed" that many people have wrongly latched on to and misquoted based on the context.
Here's what I came to believe on masturbation. It's normal. You are not dirty, you're not a sex fiend and you most certainly are NOT going to hell for it. What the bible warns against is becoming addicted. Everything in moderation. Just as a glass of wine with dinner, the occasional beer with friends is ok--the drunkeness, addictive behavior that might result, is not. The other thought is that the practice of masturbation would lead to the desire to have more and ultimately premarital sex.
If you understand that masturbation is for alone time, is not meant to be done fanatically while you lose interest in everything else around you and is a normal part of growing up--I'm sure you'll be a well-rounded individual and maintain your religious beliefs.
First of all, you CANNOT feel guilty for what you do in your sleep. When I was pregnant, my husband would wake up to me screaming like a sailor, cursing everybody and their mother. Do I remember this? Nope. Do I feel guilty? Absolutely not.
Second--masturbation. Such a sensitive subject. I went to a youth leaders confernec several years ago where this was a topic in one of the workshops--how do we talk to teens about it? It was great, really. The guy moderating it didn't give a yes or no answer. The bible does not day anything for or against masturbation. There's a scripture, I belive in Genesis about "wasting seed" that many people have wrongly latched on to and misquoted based on the context.
Here's what I came to believe on masturbation. It's normal. You are not dirty, you're not a sex fiend and you most certainly are NOT going to hell for it. What the bible warns against is becoming addicted. Everything in moderation. Just as a glass of wine with dinner, the occasional beer with friends is ok--the drunkeness, addictive behavior that might result, is not. The other thought is that the practice of masturbation would lead to the desire to have more and ultimately premarital sex.
If you understand that masturbation is for alone time, is not meant to be done fanatically while you lose interest in everything else around you and is a normal part of growing up--I'm sure you'll be a well-rounded individual and maintain your religious beliefs.
Wait, sorry, for some reason I thought the person was younger...
While the same holds true for masturbating at home and in his/her sleep...it no longer is a "normal" part of "growing up." Ok to do, but not part of growing up anymore.
While the same holds true for masturbating at home and in his/her sleep...it no longer is a "normal" part of "growing up." Ok to do, but not part of growing up anymore.
It's good to know that it took him/her a good 30 years before he/she even started feeling guilty.
Perhaps this is an indication that any guilt felt is completely unnecessary and that he/she is still a great human indeed.
My opinion is not an informed Christian based view...it's an informed humanitarian perspective.
Good wishes to your friend!
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Perhaps this is an indication that any guilt felt is completely unnecessary and that he/she is still a great human indeed.
My opinion is not an informed Christian based view...it's an informed humanitarian perspective.
Good wishes to your friend!
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