I know...sometimes you just can't tell! Sometimes it's tough to see through the cloud of a complex relationship. Sometimes you are just so FOCUSED on those few, rare but exciting moments when your relationship actually feels good, when you feel connected, when it seems like he (or she) is the only person in the world who understands you...that you don't see the amount of energy you are expending on a person who is giving nothing back. You forget that relationships are supposed to be happiness sprinkled with some struggle, not struggle sprinkled with some happiness.

It doesn't matter how old you are, or how long you've been in a relationship. Most of the time, a LOSER or a bad relationship is not as easy to observe as a black eye. Most of the time, it is simply a culmination of those slick and subtle moments when you feel like crap. These moments are clear to the people who love you, but not always so clear to the person enduring the pain.

The following essay, by Dr. Joseph Carver is genius. It identifies clear (YET SUBTLE) behaviors that lead to the black eye, or even the hospital visit. It calls out those seemingly inconsequential comments like,

"He just has a bit of a temper."

"He wanted to marry me a month after we met!"

"Be sure not to talk about a, b, or c in front of her."

"It's my fault she's so angry all the time."

Read this link. Think about past relationships. Think about your best friend's new girlfriend. Think about that new guy you just met. Take care of yourself and take care of each other.

Are you dating a LOSER?

http://www.drjoecarver.com/loser.html