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Tuesday, February 28, 2006
A way to tell an ex girlfriend to leave you alone
Tom, 36, from New York asks: What is a way to tell an ex girlfriend to leave you alone? I have tried to be cordial and civil, but she keeps calling me. She wants to assume "things are the way they were" and they're not, not at all. I think she is obsessed with me.
VictorM's advice: You have my sympathy. This can be hell. And if you aren't cordial then she'll have you right at "you're an asshole", and of course everyone in town will know about it. Don't give her that satisfaction.
The thing she wants most from you is attention. Doesn't matter if it's good or bad attention. So you have to stop giving it to her. You have nothing else to explain to her, so don't. Ignore her as much as you can. Avoid the places she might be at. Block her emails and Private messages. Just ignore her, ignore her, ignore her. And if she still manages to get to you, don't act annoyed. Act indifferent, as if she doesn't matter. Then move on.
Last but not least... introduce her to your worst enemy.
VictorM's advice: You have my sympathy. This can be hell. And if you aren't cordial then she'll have you right at "you're an asshole", and of course everyone in town will know about it. Don't give her that satisfaction.
The thing she wants most from you is attention. Doesn't matter if it's good or bad attention. So you have to stop giving it to her. You have nothing else to explain to her, so don't. Ignore her as much as you can. Avoid the places she might be at. Block her emails and Private messages. Just ignore her, ignore her, ignore her. And if she still manages to get to you, don't act annoyed. Act indifferent, as if she doesn't matter. Then move on.
Last but not least... introduce her to your worst enemy.
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