Jeni, 30, from Mi asks: I was seeing this guy (we will call him M) for a few weeks (we never had sex). We truly were getting to know each other and everything was great until bam we ran into his ex out one night. They had broken up for 8 years. M started acting weird and distant, so I backed off. He didn't call and I didn't call him. Since then he has shown up when I was out having fun with my friends. He stared and tried to join the conversation. When he asked me how I was and I responded back to him in a nice positive way. He approached me a few times during the night, making his little sarcastic comments. Later we all left and went to our friend B's house. He later showed up there with a woman. She was loud and kissing all over him and he kept walking away from her. A little while later, I had enough of his antics so I went upstairs to lie on the couch to sleep. After a few minutes, he came up and covered me up. He startled me. Then he stood there staring at me, while I lay there trying to sleep. Then he said something rude about me again, so I said something sarcastic back. This man drives me crazy and please tell me what his deal is? Why would he chase me all over town? Chase me all night, bring someone else to our friend’s house then leave her alone and chase me some more? Should I talk to him about all of this? What is he THINKING/FEELING? Please Help Me!!!!!! Confused

VictorM’s advice: I assume you’re not interested in him anymore. If that’s so, you should tell him. By you talking nicely to him and allowing him to cover you up, he’s figuring he still has a chance and you’re just playing hard to get because you're pissed. He's not seeing you being nice as just merely being polite; he's seeing it as you still having feelings for him.

He chases you because either he likes you or he’s just one of those guys that has to have what he can’t have. If his ex dumped him the first time around, she became the challenge when he saw her. So he went in that direction. My guess is she wasn’t interested, and now you are giving him the cold shoulder – perfect! He now has a new challenge.

So why the other woman at your friend’s party? Why the sarcastic comments? Why the rude comments? Well, simple: he’s an asshole!

Be grateful you have seen this side of him. Tell him you’re not interested at all in him, and quit being nice to him.



Tags: advice, dating, relationship, question, answer, breakup, boyfriend, girlfriend